Episode 30

MY V.I.

(a soap opera)

One of Mary Haley's favorite parts about belonging to Mayhem was the fact that she had access to his collection of classic Mercedes 600 Pullman Limousines.

Today, she was in a "red" mood and

so she called down to have the driver pull around the colossal, crimson cruiser.

The driver, known only as Uncle Quagmire, pulled up to the front of the house and opened the back door to allow Mary access to the vintage "lap" of German luxury.

She sauntered out the front door, shamelessly swinging her latest gift from Mayhem - a Valentino Rose Vertigo bag. Mary felt that it showed he truly loved her although, deep down, she suspected it might be a breathtaking knock-off.

She was uncharacteristically haughty as she sailed past the driver, and without the slightest eye contact mumbled, "Thank you, Quagmire."

Her door was shut and Quagmire took his seat behind the wheel and fired-up the massive engine. They were on their way.

Back on the Island; Brianna Bailey was saying her goodbyes to Charmaine following their interview for the Daily Pilot.

"Thanks again, Charmaine. I'll e-mail you and let you know when the story will run," Brianna said as she and her photographer stepped out of the V.I. and onto the sidewalk.

"Well, thank you, Brianna. I'm really looking forward to reading it," Charmaine returned.

Brianna and the photographer began walking down the sidewalk toward their cars.

"She's a very nice young lady," Brianna said.

"Yeah, well I find it hard to believe that she could find her way out of a paperbag - she seems dumb as a box of rocks, to me," the photographer replied.

Brianna playfully slapped his arm as they stepped into the crosswalk.

"That's not very nice!"

They were both laughing as they reached the middle of the crosswalk. Then suddenly, out of nowhere, came a four-door Nissan Sentra with the radio blaring "It's Raining Men," which nearly ran them over as it roared past.

"Are you kidding me!?" the photographer yelled as he pushed Brianna out of the way.

"Get the license plate number!" Brianna called out.

Unfortunately, they were only able to give the police the following description:

"Victims stated that late model, four-door Japanese car with 'crazy' red-headed female driver and middle eastern looking man wearing Arab garb nearly ran them over in crosswalk at Marine and Park."

TUNE IN NEXT TIME FOR ANOTHER EXCITING EPISODE OF MY V.I.!